My Dear Deluded Duo,
You've got your history completely muddled. Due to your Freudian fixation on the Royal Family, you Britishers overlooked the fact that America and India are now completely independent.
In fact the day Britain, in all its snootiness, decided to break off the Eurasian mainland, and dug a huge moat around itself, filled it with the Loch Ness Monster and covertly charged the entire Empire with the bill, was the day it lost its dominion over the world.
You are now at best a neglected 51st State of the USA, much like a badly behaved, misguided, smaller brother of Texas. You insist you are sovereign but really, waving a flag and feeding a Queen doesn't actually spell liberty. In fact you are more accurate chanting "God Bless America, and while you're at it, Save the Queen" too. If you all mend your loony ways and behave yourselves, you might just earn a star on their flag!
As a tribute to your twisted beliefs may I, in all humility, suggest a slogan for The Bugle, (which did you know is also defined as a misery pipe?!) ?
The Bugle: Declaring The War on Facts, by the Sentries of Bull Shit.
Yours lovingly,
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