Nothing else matters...

There's something that binds us
Something deep, primitive yet unique
You won't understand it
We don't understand it either
It is something, beyond description
It cannot be bound by the mundane vocabulary
Or dragged to the ground by efforts to unveil
A fleeting emotion that comes haunting back
Loyal to a lost tune
A forgotten phrase
The feeble hope of visiting of a long lost place
And time
But it exists
Even though fleetingly for brief lapses in my own conscience
But it still survives
An uneasy ghost of a beautiful past

Some faaltu time, an apology not made and a movie..

Rays of truth,
explode forth
after an age of being crushed
buried, shrouded,
obscured, clouded.

Fighting a lost cause,
for years now
No idea why
No clue how.

Such a beautiful battle
An adorable strife
Torn between emotions
Denial vs Acceptance
life vs Life.

Re living those moments
Relishing memories some
Thoughts that were erased
Feelings that were overcome

Run so far away from
My essence, my core
What was so beautiful
to me, inherent before.

Why fight what is pure
So sublime yet strong?
It is mine to endure,
to possess, to belong.

Maybe it's the jingoism,
It goes to my head
Made promises to keep
Am breaking them instead

Caught today in the act
of a play
Scripted to keep all
obvious at bay.

It seems impossible now
To stop, to restrain.
To pretend, lie and vow
To never speak the truth again.

This is the Life

How fleet is a glance of the mind!
Compared with the speed of its flight,
The tempest itself lags behind,
And the swift-wingèd arrows of light.
When I think of my own native land,
In a moment I seem to be there;
But, alas! recollection at hand
Soon hurries me back to despair. -W.Cowper

Obamania..

There are some people one simply can't hate. Ok forget that, there are some people one can't help liking. I did not believe that possible till I personally got to know people like that. And as the country and the world goes hysterical after Obama I face those same questions again.

I don't know what it is about such people. I suspect it is not one single quality but a host of varied ones. Each different person hangs on to a different aspect and finds his own personal God in that person. It is amusing and remarkable at the same time, this united mass-spread devotion, affection, reverence for one being and not even because he has achieved something great or affected society yet, but simply for the person he is, for his ideals, his conduct.

Earlier I used to stand in the by lane and watch this inexplicable mass worship and smile to myself, perplexed. I never understood it.
But whatever it is, it makes the world seem a better place.
It reaffirms our faith in humanity, in the belief that atleast people worship righteousness.

To me it speaks of the innate admiration we all have for something true, honest, for something pure. We may not be 'Howard Roarks' but atleast we look up to someone who we think comes close. This is not to say that I have actually come across any Roarks or that Obama is untainted. No one's perfect and we all know that, in fact everyone's definition of perfect would also be different.

Anyway, without getting side tracked(although I wonder if there is a track here!) so many times the projected greatness of a person has a lot to do with the projection besides the origin. When such highly adored people fail to live up to those aspirations that others have for them, it crumbles the ideals of many. And it's not the fault of the up held. Many a time the crown is unwanted, the admiation unasked for and the expectations unjustified. So the unwilling hero ends up dissappointing people who wrongly marked in him quality he didn't possess.

But I think in the end it doesn't really matter, people need their heroes, it gives them hope, it gives them faith, we all need someone to look up to, someone to admire, people to put on those pedestals we make. And being so massively loved at so mind boggling a scale couldn't be bad! :)

I still don't have any answers though, neither does anyone I ask. They all say well he has this quality you know, you can't help liking him!

Having exams is one damnable thing. The mightiest of blights.
It makes people insane, inane, giggly, gossipy. It inspires random chat sessions, high pitched squealy laughter and in this case crappy blog posts.
Whenever I am bogged down with work, I decide to go on one long holiday of denail! I refuse to start working, what the hell, just need to get through these hours, it'll all settle down on its own. Eventually I will realise it's too late to achieve anything anyway and stop making horrendously demanding goals and that's it!
Such demanding times also bring with them a deep urge to share one's misery. The best way to do that is put up a status message on Gtalk, and not just any status message, a voluble, in-the-face, advertisement on how sucky one's life is.
I also remember getting weird urges in such crunch times. The weather outside always seems devilishly awesome. The traitor, always tempting with lovely moods right when I cannot enjoy it!
I get pangs to read books, ones that I never pick up in leisure, I suddenly realise how long it has been since I have painted or sung.
Today it's different. Today I am getting this strong urge to get a puppy. And not any random puppy, but the one that sits posing in the middle of my wallpaper between two others. I have no idea why ! But I really want that pup, the cute light brown Golden Retriever.
I don't want anything else or beyond, I can't seem to think beyond the puppy! :(
Even exams or graduation or presentations don't matter so much ! I want the puppieeeeeeeeee !!! :((((((((((

His intellect, temperament, judgment, core decency, empathy for humankind combined with track record .. on Obama

She's right.. that does resonate!

It also rings.

I wish I were what I thought I was.